Invitation To Rest

Whilst sitting in a Caribou café on a Sunday evening doing homework, I overheard two college aged women talking about their faith. One said to the other “I have been so amazed at the number of people God has been laying on my heart to pray for. Let me share them with you.” “Did you write all of them down?” “Of course! And where else but in the [inaudible] journal?”

The girl went on to talk about how God was calling her to pray for strength for some and spiritual awakening for others. There I sat in awe of what I was witnessing with my ears. Here were two people sharing prayer requests that had been derived from spending time in God’s presence listening. I began to long for the days when I used to do that; to sit and rest in God’s presence just to be with God and to hear what God had to say. That’s what you do in relationships that matter. You listen to each other. I’ve known that this has been lacking from my life for a while now. It’s all too easy to sellout and reprioritize other peoples’ priorities over time spent with God. There is work to be done: papers to be written, books to read and analyze, spreadsheets to be organized, mailings to be prepared, bills to pay, sermons to create, projects to be tended to and a long list of other things that are “important.” I’m reminded of the saying that one who is too busy to pray is too busy. Or the saying that “I have so much to do today I’ll have to pray twice as long!”

Perhaps that’s why I chose to spend time talking with a couple of people after church today and going to lunch with them instead of going straight to errands and doing homework. What’s more important—relationships with people or projects?; time listening to God or fretting over the long laundry list of things to be done?

Which reminds me: I need to do laundry tonight.

Cloak of Invisibility

I'm short--5'1" on a good day. Often conversations will literally go on over my head because people are generally quite a bit taller than I am (at least by 5-10" on average). I get that I'm not easily seen. Up until recently (within the last year), I haven't spoken much or voiced my thoughts/opinions out loud which has added a layer to my invisibility.

I'm reading a book called Difficult Conversations by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton and Sheila Heen from the Harvard Negotiation Project. It's an easy read and quite insightful about what makes conversation and communication so difficult for people. They break it down into three basic parts that most conversations have:
1) "What Happened" Conversation
2) Feelings Conversation
3) Identity Conversation
The chapter I happened to read today was on listening. In a difficult conversation, focus on listening to learn about the other person because you genuinely want to learn and understand. If you can operate on that plane, people will feel heard, accepted and will be more likely to listen to what you are saying. That's great, makes sense and is extremely useful.

What bugs me is the idea that to be heard you must first surrender and listen to the other person. If I'm always the one listening, who will listen to me? When will I not be under the radar and be acknowledged as having a valid point and commentary--even if people don't agree with it??? When do I get to be cared for and appreciated?

Harry Potter uses his cloak when he wants to disappear. What about when you want to be seen?